The next in our tandem babywearing series, Sarah talks about wearing her toddler and her infant. Previous posts on tandem babywearing include Ruby’s post on wearing her newborn twins.

 

I never intended to spend several hours a day wearing a three-year-old and a baby at the same time…. it just happened that way.  My two-year-old was still happy to be worn throughout my second pregnancy, and I had no intention of stopping after the baby was born.  I expected my older child to be worn less and less throughout her fourth year, but she knows when she’s onto a good thing! 

 

We moved to India for five months soon after the baby was born and wearing two became an absolute necessity.  We were living in the mountains and walking several hours a day, taking advantage of great hiking trails but also just doing what we had to to get around without a car or access to public transport.  The roads were too rough and steep for a stroller and fraught with dangers and annoyances for a walking child, like maniac drivers, stray dogs, cows and monkeys and cowpats and other excrement.  Now we’re back in Australia and even though I have a hefty seven-month-old we’re still going strong! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Because tandem babywearing has been so essential for me, I’ve been forced to make it work as effectively as possible.  The carriers that work best for me may not suit everyone, but here’s what I’ve learned about tandem carrying in general:

 

 

Considerations when choosing your carriers:

 

• Bulkiness - The carrier that goes on first generally needs to have thin straps, which can sit unobtrusively under the second carrier.

 

I use a Mei Tai on the front first and have my older child in a structured carrier on my back.   It helps to have carriers which tie in different places - e.g. one at the waist and one at the hips.

 

I occasionally use a ring sling on the front but it’s hard to get the back carrier straps positioned snugly over the bulky sling fabric.  It works best with an unpadded ring sling with a trim shoulder style and thinner fabric.  I like a pleated shoulder. 

 

Invest in a babywearing coat for cold weather - it’s hard to get two sets of shoulder straps to sit comfortably over a bulky coat or jumper.

 

 

 

• Ease of use - it’s going to take you twice as long to get ready as it does with only one child - streamline things as much as possible by choosing carriers you can put on quickly. It’s also hard to take the time to do a complex back carry properly when you already have a baby dangling from your chest!

 

Think about ‘poppability’ - does your toddler like to get down and walk regularly?  Does your baby need to be taken out to be fed or pottied a lot while you’re out?

 

 

• Weight distribution - choose carriers which distribute weight to different parts of your body - e.g. a front carrier like a wrap or Mei Tai which puts the weight on your shoulders and back, and a structured carrier which distributes the weight to your hips. I’ve carried two in one ring sling, and it’s quick and easy but gets heavy very quickly!

 

 

 

Think of tandem babywearing as a strenuous sport and ‘train’ accordingly:

 

• Practise every day or nearly every day to stay in shape.

 

• It’s the ultimate progressive weight training system - so start early, with a newborn or preferably during pregnancy if you feel comfortable.

 

• Take it easy the day before and after a long session of tandem wearing. I can manage a four-hour hike if I limit tandem babywearing to 30 minutes or so the day before, otherwise I end up with aching shoulders very quickly. Expect to feel exhausted the next day!

 

• Become more aware of your body’s needs - in particular be gentle on your knees. I tend to hyperextend my knees when walking fast so I keep my pace slow and steady and use ski poles for steep descents.

  

 

 

Never sacrifice correct positioning to accommodate a tandem carry - it’s even more important when you are carrying extra weight.

 

• If you use a Mei Tai on the front, the straps will have a tendency to ride up to your neck. Make sure they stay under the straps of the second carrier as you put it on.

 

• Take the time to put the first carrier on correctly and always bounce and tighten. Retie both carriers if you need to - it’s worth the extra time it takes.

 

 

 

Travel as light as possible

 

• I can get everything I need for a longish walk, including drink bottles and snacks into a furoshiki bag made from a napkin, which I tie on to my waist belt.

 

• Heavy grocery bags are a killer - invest in a nana trolley!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Keep an eye out for other tandem wearing posts during March. Did you muscle up and wear your toddler and your infant when your family expanded? What worked for you? How did you go about it? Share with us!

The first in a series of posts during tandem wearing month at BCD, Ruby talks about how she got started on the ultimate babywearing adventure: TWO babies at once!

 

After having about 5 years experience carrying one kiddo at a time, it was time for a new adventure… and the arrival of our twins in August 2008 sure answered the call! As I write, the babies (Oliver is about a half kilo heavier than his “big” sister Catalina) are six months old. The thoughts below are reflections from the preemie/newborn/hospital period, and might be helpful to parents with twins on the way (or newborn twins), or anyone else with preemies or babies in Special Care Nurseries.

 

Before you become terrified by the thought of two tiny babies attached to you,  begin to tell yourself it is OK not to have both babies on you at all times! You can still be committed to the ideals of babywearing/attachment parenting. Parenting a newborn is tiring, stressful hard work… parenting two or more can be murder! Add to that “normal” stuff like colic, reflux, health problems etc… be gracious toward yourself.

 

My eldest (now 5) was only ever carried in a sling or stretchy wrap.  My second (now 3) was carried in slings, a stretchy wrap, mei tais and a structured soft carrier (SSC).  In preparing for the arrival of our babies, I just made sure I had a sling ready;  sort of.  The babies arrived early and I ‘only’ had a couple of days to make what seemed at the time to be a million decisions.  So, I went with what I felt was the most gentle, natural carrier.  I think it is valuable to have at least one carrier you feel confident in using, or at least confident to try. Have a few trial runs so you get a sense of how to put your carrier on and adjust it. Like all things, you do get better with practise!  Some people have successful trial runs with teddy bears (right size, wrong weight) or bags of flour (right sort of weight, wrong shape!)

 

If you can, familiarise yourself with “kangaroo care”.  There’s tons of info online, but basically, whenever and for as long as you and your babies are able, get skin-to-skin contact (that’s the bare naked-skin kind!). It is important for all babies to have skin-to-skin contact with mum, but especially important for small, early, sick and/or babies born in traumatic circumstances. It has a really positive effect on your babies stress levels, heart rate and bonding. It can also have a positive effect on mum! Try to find some privacy, get your shirt off (or open down the front, and pop you baby in while they are just in a nappy. Use a sling or a wrap over yourselves, and try not to feel pressured into limiting time/contact or feel obligated to hold both babies at once. Obviously, if your children are connected to machinery, you’re limited by how far you can move (we had our daughter hooked up for a while). You may also encounter problems with staff - my advice is to go to the head of the Nursery, get your permissions from her/him, and not enter debate with the nurses who change at every shift.

 

A single ring sling is great for small babies. You can use just one sling to carry either one or both babies as newborns, and you might even try breastfeeding while using a sling. It can offer great support - and a bit more privacy - while recovering from birth, either vaginal or by Caesar. I found initially that the babies’ heads would clonk together unless I was especially careful! Still, two slings was much too difficult for me in the early days. I preferred settling my larger baby in, sitting legs crossed or froggy style, and then sliding the smaller baby along side, resulting in them both being “tummy to tummy”[T2T] (actually, more like T2breast… or the other T if you prefer). Other people have had success placing the larger baby (if there’s a difference) in a cradle carry, which is essentially a lie across your body supported by the sling, and then place the other baby on top, maybe facing the first baby so they can see one another.  I tried but didn’t find this position comfy; like most things, what you find comfortable may differ.

 

A stretchy wrap is also great, and you can easily make your own from stretchy cotton jersey (t-shirt material) from a local fabric shop. You don’t need anything fancy. I do recommend a soft stretchy jersey or other interlock, though.  My stretchy wrap is made of a polyester mesh which is lovely and cool, but I didn’t like the ‘net’ on my preemies; I waited until they were out of hospital before I used a front wrap cross carry (FWCC), and had one baby in each side of the cross, with the wrap over both. We could all settle down in an armchair and snooze like that! Plus, if you are practising Kangaroo Care, the FWCC covers you completely and provides a lot of privacy. With a stretchy wrap, it’s also “poppable” - you can “pop” a baby in or out without having to untie or re-tie the whole wrap.

 

Any other carriers/styles suitable for newborns are great… after all, you don’t have to wear both babies at the same time. I just play with different things as the spirit moves, or whenever I have the energy and desire to try something different!!! Of course, you don’t need to try anything different- one carry that works for you is all you need. Leaving the hospital - and leaving the house - with twins is a whole different story… so we’ll leave that for another post!

© Ruby/ScarletRubies 2009_0202

 

Further resources  you may find helpful:

• Wrapping instruction links at the Babywearer (you must be logged in to access)
• Wearing more than one forum at the Babywearer
• Kangaroo care instructions with a ring sling and wrap (downloadable PDF format). Video:

 

Keep an eye out over March for further posts on tandem wearing. Have you worn more than one? How did you get started? Leave a comment and let us know!

Welcome to March, everyone! BCD blog has been up and running for a month now and we’ve talked about PND, getting high while babywearing, toddler wearing and zombies. If you’re new to BCD blog, we’re only just getting started- so now’s the time to catch up!

 

There’s lots more to come in March, especially this month’s theme: tandem wearing. In the coming weeks, we’ll hear from Ruby on how to get started with twins, Sarah will talk about SSCs and Mei Tais with two and Steph will talk about wrapping two in one wrap. That’s not all, though, because we’ll also be talking about different kinds of wrap marketing, babywearing as a parenting subculture and stash strategies.

 

Thanks for being here in our very first month. We hope you’ll stick around and see what else we’ve got on offer. In the meantime, I encourage you to find out about guerilla babywearing… it’s as intriguing as it sounds!