As I’ve said before on this blog and pretty anywhere else I talk about baby carriers (which is a lot of places!), I love a bit of glam in my babywearing stash. Once the baby’s tied on, nobody can see what I’m wearing - so I may as well make a fashion statement with my sling. But how much bling is too much?

You see, I have this fabulous electric blue sequinned disco jacket. It’s so 80’s nightclub trash that I want to puke glitter just thinking about it. It’s one of the joys of my dreary grey Canberra winter existence (even the election campaign hasn’t been enough to perk me up this winter). I would have LOVED a mei tai with a feature panel in that blue sequinned fabric when I had newborns, for those days when I just wanted to sit and cry on the couch with sleep deprivation. Putting on something sparkly really does help - it’s a bit “fake it til you make it”, but it works for me.

In the meantime, I’ve gotten away with just a bit of a sheen rather than in-your-face shine. After all, I don’t want to blind people!

Hemp silk is one of my favourite fabrics for a sling. Breathable, but with a lovely soft sheen on the silk side of the fabric. I’ve also seen some stunning 100% silk slings that would feel ever so soft on sensitive newborn skin. My excuse is that silk has natural healing properties that are particularly good for babies with rashes

Mei tais are also absolutely fabulous with a bit of bling. I used to have one with a gorgeous brocade feature panel in purples and silvers. Even better, mei tais can be worn reversed if daddy isn’t metrosexual enough to get away with shiny-side-out.

I’ve also seen some very pretty stretchy wraps with a pocket panel in brocade fabric. I bet it would be easy to just sew a panel like this over the existing pocket panel in your old stretchy, if you feel the need for a facelift. You could even match it to your favourite jacket or bag - ooh bling and matchy-matchy! My two favourite ways to wear babies!

If you already have a plain sling, you can dress it up with a bit of hand beading along the rails. Similar things work on straps - a bit of embroidery with silver thread on the straps, and hey presto! Bling sling!

Just one word of warning on coordinating the look… bling slings are best worn with a plain outfit, and go easy on the metallic lip gloss. Otherwise you’ll spontaneously combust as soon as you step into sunlight.

I’d love to hear from anyone else with a bling sling obsession, even if just so I don’t feel like the odd one out who considers baby carriers an extension of the jewellery box.

Happy World Breastfeeding Week! It’s celebrated internationally from 1 to 7 August 2010. Unlike breastfeeding, which is something normally done by the mother, babywearing can be done by anyone - breastfeeding or not. But one of the many cool things about carrying a baby in a traditional-style sling or carrier is that it can make breastfeeding easier.

You can use your sling or carrier to support baby for hands-free breastfeeding. We’ve blogged here in the past about how best to breastfeed in a long wrap, mei tai, and in a ring sling.  As a retail shop owner, I’ve helped many mums of newborns with getting baby in the right position to breastfeed hands-free, and some of them have come back later to tell me how it helped their posture (reducing back pain from leaning over while breastfeeding) or made it easier to chase a toddler while feeding the baby.

Another benefit of babywearing is that all the skin contact helps get the hormones working properly. Skin contact prompts oxytocin, which prompts milk in the breast to flow, which prompts prolactin to make more milk. A beautiful supply-and-demand cycle.

My second baby also benefited from babywearing to support breastfeeding when being worn by a child-care worker. She was an extreme bottle refuser who would rather starve to death than take liquid from any form of cup or bottle til she was about nine months old. So when she was five months old and I returned to work, I drove from work to the childcare centre to feed her in my lunch break. Sometimes she would be hungry before I arrived, but there was nothing they could do to feed her until I got there. Enter babywearing! Many times I would arrive to feed my baby, expecting to find her distressed and starving, only to see that she was chilled out and happy in the sling that I had left with her carer (a twenty-something rugby-fan bloke). In an ideal world, she wouldn’t have had to wait. But in this imperfect world we live in, keeping her calm made it much easier for her carer to attend to the other babies in the room, and made it easier for me to get her attached for a proper feed when I arrived. Ever tried to get a cranky baby to latch on properly? Not easy! A calm baby is much easier to feed, in my experience.

There have also been times when breastfeeding was a real struggle for me. Being able to carry my babies and keep them close helped soothe the emotional upset for both of us, making it easier for me to stay positive and keep trying. Without that positive influence, the confidence that I am a capable parent, I might have found it easier to just give up on other aspects of parenting that were difficult.

So thankyou babywearing, for making it easier for to breastfeed my babies.

The Mythical Benefits of Babywearing

 Did you ever read one of those lists about the ‘Benefits of Babywearing’ which tell you that worn babies rarely cry; are happy to hang out in a sling all day while the parent works; and turn into secure, confident, independent, compassionate toddlers?  I have no idea who these children are, but they bear no relation to my kids.   Lists like these are great for encouraging people to wear their babies but can be misleading.

 Like many people, I tend to emphasise certain things when advocating babywearing.  I go on about how convenient it is for the parent and avoid mentioning the benefits for the child’s long-term development.  I know that as soon as I say something about the how it’s good for the child’s emotional wellbeing, my own children will start whining or screaming.  And with a daughter who only walked at seventeen months, I feel that I’m in no position to talk about the way babywearing helps motor skills development.

I can just imagine people thinking, “If that’s how they turn out I’m definitely not trying this baby carrier thing….” And then there are my own doubts… if it really is such a great practice, then why are my kids so rude/clingy/whiny/selfish/sulky/aggressive/uncoordinated….??

Do you really want a ‘good’ child?

Well…. yes I do!  Sometimes I long for a ‘well behaved’ child who does what I say in public and shares her toys… but what kind of children do we really want to raise?  Compliant?  Independent?  Conformist?  Assertive?  Is an unquestioningly compliant child really such a great thing?

We have definite ideas in our culture about what makes a ‘good’ baby or child and babywearing does not always cultivate these characteristics.  Babywearing is not going to give you a baby who sleeps through the night, is happy to be held by anybody and entertains herself for hours on end.  It will foster emotional security, but it won’t make your child do what you say; in fact it may have the opposite effect if she is so secure that she doesn’t feel a desperate need to please you.  It can calm down an angry child, but will not encourage or teach her to repress her emotions to conform to some abstract ideal of good behaviour. 

Are your children as bad as you think they are?

Everyone thinks that their children are the worst they know, if not the worst in the world, barring a few that are featured on Supernanny.  Chances are they’re not.

We often tend to notice negative behaviour in our children; while you may be worrying that your toddler seems overly clingy, another parent may be admiring the way your child relaxes into the security of your back.  That humiliating public tantrum will probably be dismissed as ‘normal three-year-old behaviour’ by anyone with children of their own.

A Zen approach to behaviour management

One of the mothers I admire most is a practising Buddhist.  Her children are as temperamental as any: they can be sullen, rough, clingy, hysterical and rude.  But what sets her apart from other parents I know is her calm acceptance of their behaviour.  No matter what they do, she never appears worked up, upset or embarrassed; and her relaxed vibe is infectious and inspiring.  And yes, she did wear her children!

We often judge ourselves as parents by how our children perform physically, cognitively, verbally, socially or intellectually.  Instead of accepting the moment, we imagine the unsociable behaviour to reflect negatively on all the choices we have made, including babywearing.  It’s not worth worrying about.  Next time your toddler has a public meltdown, just throw her on your back in a strap carry and if that doesn’t impress people…. well, at least you can make a quick getaway.

I have a pretty small stash by babywearing addict standards - more than 20, but not by much. Still, it would be nice to have a better storage solution than bags in the spare cupboard, or leaving them lying around the house and car. The keys to sling storage are holding in straps that want to escape, and visibility. I don’t want to be opening drawers at random when I’m searching for a specific sling in a hurry, and I tend to forget I have other beautiful slings when I can’t see them.

Here’s some ideas for small storage solutions to go in the spare cupboard:

Left: Clear storage bins from IKEA - the angled lid at the front means you can reach in and grab slings when the containers are stacked on top of each other.

Middle: Storage boxes with clear windows on the front from IKEA - the only downside is that I have different sling types that are very similar colours (eg green ring slings and green mei tais, or blue long wraps and blue shortie wraps).

Right: Hanging storage from IKEA - hang it in the wardrobe where sticky toddler hands can’t easily rearrange your wraps.

And if I had the budget, here’s some ideas for larger storage furniture pieces:

Left: Glass-front cabinet from IKEA

Middle: Shelves from Fantastic Furniture - great for storing carriers in the kids bedroom, and you can write on the front what’s inside

Right: Ladder shelf from IKEA - you could also use an actual ladder - shock! Yes, it is possible to use things for something other than their originally intended purpose, like babywearers who co-opt tablecloths as shortie wraps…

And finally, a lockable cabinet for those who are lucky enough to have a stash that includes a long wrap handwoven on a hundred year old loom in Eastern Europe. If you’ve spent your budget on slings and can’t stretch it to the IKEA version shown above, you can pick up a cheaper, boring grey version from the ex-government warehouse and paint it in whatever shade of enamel rocks your boat.

So what do you like? Or do you already have your own perfect sling storage solution?

I posted a few weeks ago about our short trip to hospital this month and thought you could all use an update. Firstly, the procedure went well and our results were what we were hoping for. Baby girl is on a specific diet and all her symptoms are clearing up. Turns out, babywearing wasn’t the cure for her insanely high needs, but it did help! (OK, so she’s still very intense, but she’s much better now :))

We had some positive and negative experiences at the hospital while babywearing and this information is probably useful, so here’s our experience: I decided to take a short wrap and a pair of slingrings with me for our day trip. I’m very proficient with short wraps, but I do like to breastfeed hands free in a ring sling, so I thought this would cover me well for back, front, hip and breastfeeding carries.

Actually, instead of my streamlined approach, I wish I’d gone a little overboard and brought another carrier. Since A. needed to go under a general anaesthetic for her procedure, she was fasting for an extended period. A fasting baby smooshed up against lactating breasts isn’t conducive to calm behaviour! My intention here was to ruck (under bum or tie in front), but unfortunately, this isn’t the best back carry for a vigorously protesting child (read: tantrum). Short wraps do have some pretty wiggle-proof options like the strap carry and the short cross carry, however the former isn’t great for snuggling and sleeping, while the latter isn’t so quick to tie on a resistant child. What I really wanted was a wrap long enough to SHBC (or a mei tai!). In the end, I had to make do with front and hip carries to avoid a babywearing accident in a back carry and that wasn’t conducive to settling her quickly.

I also found that my no-sew ring sling idea wasn’t the best option under the circumstances. I spent a great deal of time popping my wearee in and out and these kinds of ring slings have a tendency to twist easily. They’re fine once you’ve got them settled, but take longer than a standard ring sling.

Once I got it settled, I found a ring sling (albeit a no-sew variety) was great for settling a child coming out of her anaesthetic. Wrapped up by the nursing staff like a baby burrito, she was popped into a cradle carry and the requisite monitor was easily accomodated. She slept off the drugs, woke up and demanded milk. After that, she woke up some more and demanded food. From that point, it was obvious she was back to her old self in record time.

Although babywearing was ultimately a very positive part of our hospital experience (and well regarded by the staff), I would do things differently next time. I’d accept from the outset that some carriers do different things better than others and that, even though we were only in hospital for a very short time, it wouldn’t have killed me to have another carrier on the day. Or two. Three at the outside

Have you worn your child in hospital? What was your experience? Leave a comment and let us know!

Unless you’re a mum who’s been under a rock for the last few months, you’ve probably heard that there was a huge Homebirth Australia rally in Canberra on Monday 7 September. As the ACT Branch President of Maternity Coalition, and being the organiser of the Australian Breastfeeding Association’s baby feed & change tent, I was there for the duration of the event. Unlike your average protest rally, this rally turned out to be the biggest mother’s group meeting ever, with homebirth as the special topic of the day. And it was one mega sling meet! Here’s some of the cool stuff I saw - minus brand names as this wasn’t a brand-spotting exercise so much as a celebration of the vast variety of babywearing styles:

• Mei tais in a million different prints - my faves were the retro 1970’s style prints, and a funky green stripe with cream straps that I’m pretty sure is made from organic cotton in a fair trade workplace.
• An embroidered SSC (soft structured carrier). The lady wearing it said she got it direct from the USA as it’s not yet available from Australian retailers (although as I’m a retailer of the brand myself,  I know it will be available soon).
• My friend Kate was wearing baby Nell on her back in the grooviest shade of purple I’ve seen in a while (and I’m not a big fan of purple, so that’s saying something!).
• Seeing a lady successfully breastfeeding her older baby in an SSC while standing and chatting with friends, totally looking like she wasn’t multi-tasking
• All manner of protest signs pinned onto mei tai feature panels.
• A very cool coat with extra zip panel to fit the slingling in - a great choice on a cold, rainy Canberra day.
• A mum with her baby on the front in a stretchy wrap, and toddler on the back in a mei tai.

Seeing so many happy babies was wonderful. It was cold, raining, many people had travelled across country (flying from Perth, Darwin or Brisbane, driving from Sydney, catching buses from Melbourne and more) to be there. It was exactly the place you’d expect a small child to lose their patience and have a major meltdown. But I kid you not, I saw only a few babies crying despite the crowd numbering between 2,000 and 4,000 (depending on who your source is). Slings kept them warm and comforted, and when they got overstimulated and overtired they could just tuck their head onto mum’s chest and have a nap. A truly beautiful experience.