Another in our series on wearing while injured, this time we look at bad backs. Previous posts on the topic include shoulder injuries.

Does superman tossing make you double over in pain? Does a dull ache start up in your lower vertabrae as soon as you pick up a ring sling? Welcome to the world of back injury! In this post we’ll look at prevention and cure.

Prevention

Back injuries come in many shapes and sizes, but some simple rules apply to help avoid those occasional problems caused by babywearing in the first place:

1. Start slow. Don’t start tandem wearing your 20kg preschooler at the same time you start wearing you 10kg toddler. If you’re new to babywearing or have taken an extended break, let your body get used to the weight and start out for short periods at a time.
2. Lift your child carefully. Some of our wearees can be impressively heavy, others are literally light-weights; but lifting your child is something you do repeatedly every day. Keep your child close to you so that your center of gravity isn’t pulled off balance.
3. Bend from the knees, don’t use your lower back as a lever.
4. Avoid doing dumb things. Don’t play twister while babywearing. It will be a disaster. Albeit a hilarious one.

Don’t forget that babywearing is not often a cause of back injury if you use your common sense. Thanks to all that marvellous weight bearing exercise, babywearing strengthens the muscles responsible for your core stability, actually helping to avoid back injury. Carrying a child in a supportive carrier is a lot easier on the back than carrying a child in arms for the same length of time. Of course, back carries are also great for encouraging good posture!

While you’re waiting to be cured

If you have an underlying back injury, then professional help is your best option. However, to support the healing of the affected area, there are a number of things you can do while babywearing.

1. Only wear what feels good. If front carries are painful, then avoid them. If one-shoulder carries leave you limping, then switch to the two-shouldered variety. When wrapping, carries with multiple layers will generally be more supportive than single-layer carries.
2. Don’t be afraid to ask for help to get your child onto your back. For many, lifting the child is too much of a strain, however, wearing the child is OK. If you do ask for help, make sure your helper knows exactly what they should be doing and exactly when to stop “helping” with straps and tails.
3. Wear carriers that are supportive for the weight you’re carrying. Some brands of carriers are known to be more supportive than others. Do your research, ask plenty of questions, borrow some if you can (see our loaner’s database) and find the right one for you.
4. Remember that rest may be the best cure. Less babywearing in the short-term may mean extending your babywearing well into your child’s preschool years.

Have you battled a back injury? Did you babywear while injured? What helped for you? Leave a comment and let us know!

This is the first in a series of posts aimed at helping parents with special needs. Here, we look at babywearing with a shoulder injury.

You’d like to wear your baby or older child, but red-hot pain is holding you back. Depending on the extent of your injury, it may be possible for you to wear your child while supporting the healing of the afflicted area. In this post, I’ll take you through babywearing with an injured shoulder(s). It’s an area of personal experience for me. My right shoulder has had (at various times) bursitis, tendonitis, a thinned distal portion of the rotator cuff, dense calcifcation in the tendons, possible cartilage damage and “changes to the tendonopathy of the region”, whatever that means. I didn’t understand much of the preceding, but my GP summed it up nicely when she looked at the xrays: “this shoulder is stuffed“.

If you have any injury, shoulder or otherwise, it’s important to define exactly what the problem is. I’m going to divide the possible problems into two areas: reduced range of movement and reduced ability to weight-bear. Each of these can occur independently or together, but the consequences for babywearing are quite diffferent.

Reduced Range of Movement

A reduced range of movement can occur for many reasons, but the main consequence for babywearing is difficulty in getting the child into the carrier in the first place. In this case, the simpler the better. In my experience with shoulder injuries, long wraps were disastrous- passing fabric to and fro was very painful and practically impossible. Simpler carries and carriers like short wraps, mei tais or SSCs were easier to get on with less pain. Ring slings and pouches may also be an option if only one shoulder is injured and you can bear weight on the uninjured shoulder.

When wrapping, your strategy depends on what portions of your range of movement are affected. Carries starting with a chestbelt may provide support while you wrap through your available range of movement. Alternatively, back carries tied under the wearees bottom may be impossible.

Lifting a child onto your back may be difficult in itself. It may be worthwhile reviewing other options if your regular method doesn’t work. Superman tossing is my usual method of initiating a back carry, but when lifting my arm above my head was intensely painful, lifting 9kg of baby didn’t seem sensible. The hip scooting method proved to be an acceptable compromise.

Reduced ability to bear weight on the affected shoulder

Let me be very clear: if it’s painful to wear your child, it may be wise not to do so if you want the affected area to heal. However, if wearing is important to you, there may be ways to get around the problem if you are unable to bear weight on the affected area. There are several options:

1. Avoid the area altogether. If you have two injured shoulders, it may be well worth looking into torso carries and carriers, which will eliminate any weight on your shoulder. These include torso carries with long, short wraps and straight-strapped podaegi. If you have a single injured shoulder, you have the additional option of one-shoulder carries in a short wrap, ring sling or pouch and modifying certain wrap carries (such as the BWCC with chestbelt) to avoid the affected shoulder (this was my personal favourite for extended carries. If anyone wants to know how it’s done, hit me up in the comments section!).

2. Reduce the weight on the affected area by distributing it to other parts of your body. Depending on the extent of your injury, you may still choose to bear weight on the affected shoulder(s). Carriers such as SSCs, chunei and mei tais tied tibetan or with straps crossed in front will distribute weight to your hips and across your chest, reducing the weight on your shoulders. Wrap carries with chest belts, tied tibetan or tied at the waist will do the same.

3. Teach your partner to babywear, put your feet up and wait to get better. More seriously, you may need to re-evaluate your babywearing goals. In my case, it became apparent that attempting to tandem wear 20kg+ of children at once was no longer the best option. I bought a better stroller and put babywearing on the needs-only list for awhile. It doesn’t make me a bad person! And, as a result, I’m now able to lift a coffee cup without wincing.  It was one of my better decisions!

Hopefully, this post gave you some ideas for babywearing with a shoulder injury. Look out for our next installment on babywearing with a back injury.

Have you continued to babywear with an injury or disability? What were the challenges you faced and how did you overcome them? Leave a comment and let us know!

Parenting in Public Ain’t For Wimps.

From the minute we have left the “safety” of closed doors, we are a walking, talking, mobile piece of artwork. We’re visible. The choices we make are on display. And if you choose to do something which is atypical in your community, you lose your anonymity. Like a goth at a Laura Ashley appreciation meeting, you stand out. I think. I’ve never been to a Laura Ashley appreciation meeting.

For us, we left the hospital with our two babies in a sling. A gorgeous sling. Orange, red, blue, green – nothing quiet about it. We got stopped every 5 metres between the door to the Special Care Nursery and the elevator. In the elevator, we were trapped with “twin tourists”. Then we got gawked at and stopped every 5 metres from the elevator to the exit. It seemed like 30 minutes before we were safely - and privately - in the car.

Parenting in public is difficult. Your decisions are sort of on display, and baby wearing is really obvious. No matter how neutral your wrap, sling, MT or other carrier is, it seems to glow neon when you’re out and about. Parents who wear their babies in public are brave. They are saying “I’ve thought about this; I’ve consciously decided to parent this way and even though you look at me and talk as I walk past, I am going to do what I believe is right by these kids.”

Taking your newborn out in public seems to have a magnetic effect – people seem compellingly drawn to you and your wee one. Wearing them somehow increases the magnetism, and wearing two children must be akin to the force of a neodymium magnet! It has taken about 7 months of wearing the babies in public for me to feel a sense of acceptance about the attention. In a way, I say “bring it on!” – because my children will only have this time once. My conscience tells me it’s important that babies be worn close to my heart. My conscience tells me not to distance my children from myself; to keep them near to me physically and emotionally. I don’t think it’s the easiest way to parent – and there are times when I really tire of having child after child all over me – but I believe it is right.

If you’re going to make it through with your sensibilities intact, you’re going to need support. It’s wonderful if you can get that support from your friends and family, but there’s every chance they won’t understand immediately. Please know you’re welcome to join the forums at BCD; we’d love to help support you on your parenting journey.

Do you find babywearing makes you conspicuous? Is it a positive or negative experience for you? Leave a comment and let us know!

Welcome to the Carnival of Breastfeeding! Our theme this month is “Personal Stories” and my story of traveling to one of my favourite places, nursling and wearee in tow, is below. If you’ve arrived here for the first time, you might want to check out our series on breastfeeding hands free. If you’re a regular, make sure you check out the other carnival participants below.

He stirs beneath the mosquito net. He edges closer, still half asleep. I know it must be close to four since the monks are chanting in the grey pre-dawn and the valley is silent but for their hum. He breaks the stillness, demanding my sleepy attention. I roll closer and feed him. He drifts off to sleep and I am left listening to the Buddhist cannon chanted across the valley.

An hour and a half later, the Imam chants the call to prayer and his voice sounds across the town. The Buddhists have finished their praying before the Muslims have begun and my little one has felt the passage of time too. He edges closer, pressing himself into me. As the sun is dawning, I feed him again, listening to the Imam’s prayer, piercing and clear as the day brightens.

By the time the church bells begin to toll, I am out of patience with my nursling. His father has taken him away and I luxuriate in my loneliness beneath the mosquito net listening to the bells ring out from just down the hill.

After the Christians have finished, a new hymn begins. Staccato and impatient, a language all of its own, the car horns signal the beginning of a new phase in this valley’s daily round of devotions: commercial enterprise and the accompanying traffic chaos has begun.

This is Kandy, Sri Lanka. There is no other place like it.

These sounds are a morning ritual in Kandy, an  ancient city tucked into a valley in the mountains of central Sri Lanka. Those frequent night-time and early morning feeds were our personal experience of that cultural ritual.

My son is Sri Lankan by descent, though Australian by birth, and in the New Year holiday of 2007-2008, we traveled back to the place of his father’s birth to introduce him to his extended family and his second home.

Travelling in a foreign country with a small child can be a challenge at best. Travelling in a poverty-stricken foreign country can add a new dimension to that challenge. We were lucky enough to take our son at a stage in his life when he was still worn and breastfeeding regularly. All too regularly at night, alas, which is one of the reasons I’m so very familiar with the sounds of Kandy in the early morning!

Breastfeeding helped us negotiate the intricacies of travel in several ways. Firstly, we never had to worry about clean drinking water for him. He drank water when it was safe, but if it wasn’t convenient to find it at any given point, there was a ready-made drink on hand. As a toddler, he ate solid food and was very familiar with the local cuisine, but there were inevitably some changes and differences. Breastfeeding allowed us to make up any nutritional gap. Breastfeeding also provided an important part of our routine that helped him cope with the changes that traveling entails.

Breastfeeding was a way for me to connect with the other mothers in the family. We were vastly different people from vastly different places, but our children were all fed in the same way. In a country where extended nursing is the norm and poverty is rife, it’s obvious that breastfeeding provides an important protection for infants and small children. There was a respect for the process that we shared on both sides of the cultural divide, but at the same time it was just a normal part of mothering.

The other major part of our traveling experience was babywearing. I remember tucking him up into a wrap one tropical night in Negombo and feeding him to sleep as our relatives chatted about us. The mosquitoes were ravenous that evening (and dengue fever was rife), but the wrap mercifully protected most of him from their attention, acted as a light blanket in the tropical weather and screened him from outside distractions as he drifted off to sleep in an unfamiliar place.

 
From his vantage point on our backs, our son was able to experience the full richness of Sri Lanka for himself. Whether it was getting Kozy with the elephants, attending temple for the first time with his father or walking the beaches at sunset, our son experienced all of it.

Like breastfeeding, babywearing was certainly useful from a practical standpoint. Negotiating multiple airports with a toddler who’s not just out of his time zone, but totally out of patience is much easier when you’re not juggling a pram. At our destination, however, babywearing was essential.

As a traveling rule of thumb, any street that’s just as likely to have elephants in the traffic stream as motorbikes is probably not a place where toddlers should roam freely and prams run easily. Another important piece of information for travellers: elephants do not follow road rules. Because when you’re driving an elephant down the main (one way) street of a major city against the traffic, it’s up to the rest of the city to get out of your way.

We are returning to Sri Lanka again this year with our son and our younger child. Another nursling, another wearee. More elephants to avoid and monkeys to fend off. Poverty to attempt to explain, thousands of years of history to observe. There are more memories to be made, more experiences to share. I’m quite certain I’ll be breastfeeding and babywearing on this trip, once again. I don’t know if I’ll be doing those things in tandem, but the unknown is one of the wonderful parts of traveling.

Other Carnival of Breastfeeding participants who are sharing their stories today:

• Breastfeeding Failures and Success at GrudgeMom
• Hannah’s Weaning by Amber at Strocel.com
• Weaning a Toddler at Laura’s Blog
• Life, Death and Nourishment at Stepping off the Spaceship
• Sticking with it: Our Breastfeeding Story by So Fawned.
• How Breastfeeding Changed my Life at the MotherNews Blog
• Flying Breastmilk at All That Sazz
• Ben’s Story at Massachusetts Friends of Midwives
• The “I Told You So” at Breastfeeding 1-2-3
• “They said his latch was fine” at the Motherwear blog
• Breastfeeding is not easy, but it’s certainly best for baby at Chronicles of a Nursing Mom
• Can Early Public Breastfeeding Sightings Shape One’s Future Breastfeeding Practices? at Nursing Moms Unite
• Celebrating My Chest, in Honor of Breastfeeding at Zen Mommy
• Breastfeeding After Reduction Surgery at The Towells
• Breastfeeding in Public at Blacktating
• Breastfeeding Made my the Mother I am at Breastfeeding Mums

It happens to all of them, sooner or later. The reasons are many and varied: a crowded supermarket, a big family function full of adoring relatives, one too many cupcakes. Whatever the cause, when your toddler melts down in public it’s difficult to know what to do. Often, you will wish to remove the distressed child from the scene ASAP, but when 15 kilograms of screaming muscle is fighting you every step of the way, it’s difficult. When you have other children, items that need carrying or a long way to walk it becomes impossible.

Enter the strap carry. If you’ve never done one before, the strap carry is much like a ruck, but without rails. It could conceivably be done with any piece of flexible material that can carry your child’s weight. You can find instructions on how to do the strap carry here. When using this carry with an uncooperative child, I recommend a short wrap, long enough to cross between the legs and tie in front, but use whatever you’ve got on hand!

The beauty of this carry in a difficult situation is that there are no rails to adjust, making the carry extraordinarily quick to tie. It’s also very secure. My 14kg almost-three year old has spent considerable periods “testing” the strap carry and this carry and he hasn’t gotten the best of it yet.

So, next time your toddler is melting down and you know you simply can’t get him or her up into a ruck safely, think about the strap carry. It’s simple, effective and very easy to use even in adverse circumstances.

What do you do when your toddler melts down? Is babywearing a part of your parenting toolbox in this situation? What strategies work for you? Leave a comment and maybe we can all troubleshoot this stage together!

Many toddlers go through an independent phase when they don’t want to be worn at all, or only in certain carriers/carries. Emmy became very resistant to back carries at about 20 months and would scream and struggle if I tried to put her on my back. Here are few tips to get you through this phase with your sanity intact.

These strategies are just what worked for us…. Please share any other ideas that helped you!